crazy

life.

is.

crazy.

for realz.

list of things i like.

things i like right now:

1. emails from friends.

2. getting a job interview at a church for a youth ministry position (!!!)

3. having a new baby cousin <3

4. things being better with my boyfriend

5. teaching a few skating lessons!

6. hearing back from drew, and maybe that i'll be able to take a class or two this fall.

7. maybe hearing a call...

8. harry potter: YES, i liked the movie

things i don't like:

1. headaches.

2. our washing machine at home.

3. my hair

4. humidity

i suppose that's all for now...

ramblings....

there are some days where i'm completely and entirely happy to be alive, and nothing could be better.

yet, there are others where included in all that, is the fact that anything could make me cry.

i think lately, my life has been mostly the second option.

however...the one thing that excites me? harry potter. i am re-reading some of the books right now (meaning 6 and 7...then probly 5). and i love them even more. i forgot the little details. i felt it was important, considering the sixth movie comes out next week and i have to be all up on my HP to enjoy it. although, that makes me wonder whether or not i will be more critical of it. oh wells....

man. i went to the beach today, and i am tired. it must have been from all that swimming.

some good news: i have a short temporary job at the rink working the summer camp for three days this week and next, which is exciting.

you know what's been on my mind lately? health insurance. health care reform. as most college grads learn before they get a real job: living without health insurance sucks. it really does. i mean, i should probly go to the dermatologist to check out these spots on my skin. instead? i go to webMD and google excessively to find an over the counter cure. is it working? let's hope so. but seriously? i think it's crazy that people have to live like this for YEARS. and their families. praise god that i am a healthy kid, because i couldn't imagine what it's like for families to not be able to take their child to the doctor for strep throat or something like that. or if someone was pregnant! oh dear dear dear...i think this has really opened my eyes to the injustices in our country. now, i'm not trying to put in a plug for president obama (although, i did vote for him) because i know nothing about what he's trying to do. but something's got to give. because if healthy college grad me doesn't have health insurance, that's part of some percentage of americans who could potentially have life-threatening and chronic diseases that they can't properly take care of. we need a change. our country does. i'll just keep praying for all those who don't have it. and for the people in charge of our country.

ok. off the soapbox.

meanwhile...drew next year? meaning 2010. m div., here i come. i think i'm slowly but surely figuring out how i can change the world.

life.

it's been a while. a lot has happened, including my college graduation. i can't believe i'm finished, and living back at home. it's kind of crazy how in the course of a month, life as i knew it has completely changed. transition periods aren't necessarily fun. i thought the most difficult transition for me would be the one of living at home, but that's been going rather smoothly, surprisingly. minus the fact i have nothing to do during the day. oh well. life without friends and rocky patches with boyfriends have kept me on my toes. i'm just hoping i can find a job soon.

lots of things going on in my world. i met with a friend this morning to talk about life. he happens to be a pastor, and we were chatting about the potential youth ministry job i have, and how maybe i'm being called to work in the church. i proceeded to tell him about my small nudgings about going to seminary...which all kind of stemmed from the christian scriptures class i took this past semester and LOVED. and i think about it and think about it and just seem like it could totally happen one day. not necessary this year, but sometime in the future. we'll see. it's funny because i get into modes where i think it's what i want to do, and then i get hesitant and all "yeah right...that's not rational". but sometimes, maybe god's call isn't. so, i'm going to be daring and maybe get over to drew and talk to some people. it's worth a shot, right?

other than that? life's good. can't complain. i'm happy :)

keep the faith.

it's my life...

i feel so much better.

i really think i have a plan for next year, despite the fact that my parents won't necessarily agree with it. it's my life, and not theirs.

stress?

man. i find i only update this thing when i'm stressed out about life.

i suppose you can say that. i'm just realizing all the things i have to worry about next year. i mean, i'm graduating college which means real life. sometimes i wish i could just be a child again.

the real world scares me. that's not even a little bit of an understatement. i mean, i could be health insurance-less next year if i don't get a job. that frightens me. among other crazy things like moving home.

matt and i talked over break and i want to fast forward to marriage and stuff. but those years will bring a whole nother basket of problems.

ughhhh.

quiet desperation.

"Henry David Thoreau said, "the mass of men live lives of quiet desparation." In 1854 he went out in the woods to figure out what live really is. And he determined, rightly, that people are slaves to their jobs, their responsibilities, their work. In a way, he figured out that most people are trapped where they are. Desparate and alone. They need to be set free. They need to wake up. They need to be alive."